Sunday, August 2, 2009

August Already......

I can't believe it is August already. The summers in Florida are always brutal...... how did I do it when I was younger, just laying on the South Florida beaches, just baking? Or even just a short 7 years ago, when I spent EVERY Summer weekend, sitting on hot metal bleachers watching my daughter, Lindsay, playing Travel Tournament Softball, even going out of State for the World Series of Softball many times, to sit on (whoever's) really hot metal bleachers. I remember sitting there with washcloths in the ice cold cooler and wrapping them around my head and neck to try to gain some semblance of a normal body temperature! And keeping Linz cool and hydrated was a priority as standing on that hot field playing 1st base or pitching, (or sitting in an almost hotter dugout)......well, let's just say, I don't know how she did it. I admired her for her love and dedication to the sport. I don't know how I did it either. Kinda like what I'm doing now. When I look back at the beginnings of this journey with MM, I see how many times (so far), I have faced challenges and lived to tell the tale. Some are bigger than others, ie the hospitalizations, 2 not counting the BMT. Then of course, 6 weeks in an apartment with my wonderful caretakers (Mom and Kate) during the BMT and the daily trips back and forth to the hospital. Enduring the horrid, side effects of the BMT chemo. Losing all my hair.....(not really a big big deal, but still.....I am a girl!) Then comes the disappointing fact the BMT only lasted 9.5 months and then the relapse. And since the relapse, all the troubles of constant UTI's, blood issues, transfusions (2 so far) and the multitude of daily little symptoms, from terrible fatigue to bowel issues (yep..I said it......chemo makes me constipated) and more. But.....the thing is, I've gone through all this so far, and survived, just like I survived 10 years of every single weekend of the summer sitting on all those hot bleachers. One big difference in all this though......I enjoyed those softball games, I wanted to be at every softball game (NEVER missed even one in all those years).....this MM chit? Not enjoying it so much, and wouldn't much mind if I missed a few of these MM "games" either.

4 comments:

Susan said...

enjoy your writing..your are a real trooper..keep on writing and encouraging others to keep on going. I am very greatful that I am reaching the 2 yr mark.I hope you can again some day reach remission and coutinue life as "normal" as you can..keep on truckin'...Love you girl..Susy Q

Anonymous said...

You are an angel.
Love you and think about you always.
pepper

Anonymous said...

Good luck to you Jan. I enjoyed reading your stories. My father was diagnosed yesterday. I am so sad for him and my family. Just two months ago he was still working and leading a very productive life. He is 69 years young.

Tam said...

You are a trooper, you got thru that and you will get thru this!! You are tough....